Was on a road trip with my partner to go visit friends on the NSW central coast all weekend.
Didn’t really have the time to hide away nor was there really any opportunity to have some alone / self time. So I didn’t have the opportunity to keep a journal.
While the weekend was jovial and friendly, and for the most part the mood was light and fun, I was starting to suffer from lacking the time to go and recharge.
In a way it was good to go out and have a change in scenery, to seefriends, etc … but at the same time I was sometimes forced to do or be when I was not in the mood to do or be. Maybe I should have spoken up, but I did not want to be or feel responsible for ‘being a stick in the mud’ and i reasoned that it was ‘just for a dew days’.
I was much moodier on Tuesday as we were driving back towards Melbourne. I noticed I was getting short with my partner and I couldn’t attribute it to anything, so I had to try and swallow it as I didn’t want to payout on her for no reason.
I also noticed that my self-destructive attributes were making a fore over the weekend. My desire to pick up a cigerette or cigar and sit in a corner drinking scotch was practically unbearable at times. My appetitie for sweets and binge eating on empty calories also jumped up … was a struggle at times.