On the weekend, I received a “parking infringement” for parking “beyond the time limit”. I objected with the following statement on their online ticket dispute form. I’ll let you know what (if any) response I receive back from “them”.
G’day,I’d like to offer heartfelt congratulations to “the local” Council for hiring officers of such remarkable calibre! Are psychic abilities a bonus or a required aspect of the role?
I only ask as I parked my car at 09:51 this morning (I know, because I walked out of the car and took a few photos of some pigeons on the powerlines overhead and it records details like that) and did not actually leave the car until 5 minutes later when I went to get a coffee down the road, and returned a few minutes later to get my bag.
During this time, I did not notice one of your officers, unless they also have a cloak of invisibility, which is how they could have known I parked at this time. Instead, through either having seen me in their cloak of invisibility or through some psychic evaluation, they have given me a ticket at 11:47 (a full 3 minutes before my 2 hours were up and a whole 13 minutes prior to the 2hr limit expiry for the day).
This is bloody amazing.
So, I wonder, is there some form of auditing that occurs with these psychic abilities? I ask simply in case something like the presence of an albino cat may throw doubt onto the accuracy of the reading?
I also wonder how this behaviour fits into the stated “objectives of “the local” Parking Services” which claims (according to your own site) to:
- Maintain a smooth flow of traffic and maximise the availability of parking spaces (ten minutes prior to an all day restriction removal will stop this?)
- Prevent obstructions and inconvenience to vehicular and pedestrian traffic and minimise the danger to the community which may arise due to illegal parking (not in this case)
- Ensure equitable access to all parking areas through appropriate patrolling and policing of restrictions ( fair enough but again I doubt 10 minutes will place an astonishing skew of the bell curve distribution of the said parking spaces)
- Ensure a fair and equitable treatment of offenders by following due process and complying with all legislative requirements (now, we shall see, do you simply follow the letter of the law or the spirit? Is it about fairness or revenue and quotas? )
- Maintain accurate records and histories (well, I am asking for this)
- Process all tickets, penalties paid and institute recovery procedures for any unpaid tickets quickly with the least possible delay and cost to achieve closure of the ticket (thus why I am making this enquiry online so as to allow you the most speedy of processing)
- Respond to all enquires politely, efficiently and effectively (and I’d also request in writing – a phone call to state what is in writing is also fine especially to meet the aforementioned “efficiently” requirement)
- Continuously improve our processes and procedures in line with customer feedback and improvements in technology (I hope that this will be one of those times)
I thank you for processing and reviewing this submission. I hope you take my sense of humour as intended, a way to make a point and induce a little difference to the usual rants and raves I’m sure you normally receive. Have a good day,